All of you are so good at helping me know what I think . . . right now, I'm really grateful to several of you who took time with me over the past few days to think through my next move.
As you know, I'm still trying to answer the question that was posed to me by a local city-reaching minister--"So, why did God bring you to Austin?" And, as you also know, the answer hasn't been at the end of a straight line, like I thought it would be.
So, step one was getting very clear in my own mind what I feel called to and what I enjoy. Step two was meeting everyone in Austin that would talk to me. Step three was supposed to be stepping into an already existing position or group and picking up, basically, where I left off in Houston. As you know, that didn't work. But at least I now know what I want to do and who I don't want to do it with. : )
So, in a conversation with a dear friend and mentor, I put it this way: "I think I had three options . . . one, find really sharp, quality people who are doing what I want to do and join them, two, find people who will let me do what I want to do, or three, just go do what I want to do." We agreed that option one seems to be off the table. Then I heard myself say, "I guess I can settle or risk."
Something significant changed when I heard those words coming out of my mouth. As all of you know, I don't like to risk. I don't have whatever it is that makes people want to jump out of airplanes or ride roller coasters or wear really high heels. But I remembered a night at LeadersEdge several years ago when several of the key people in my life spontaneously prayed for me that I might have courage and I have truly tried to live more courageously since then. I guess this is the next logical step.
Another precious friend was listening to me whine about being afraid and asked me what I was afraid of. I told her that I wasn't really sure but that it seemed related to failure. She astutely pointed out that there wasn't really a way to fail at this . . . and she's right.
So this week is devoted to pressing ahead, making arrangements, having different conversations with more people--please continue to pray that I will have courage.